What terrifies you and fascinates you?

Dream about beating someone with a stick

My fiance passed away suddenly due to a blood leak in his brain that doctors failed to diagnose, and shortly after I watched his heart beat for the very last time, several strange things happened.

,The first event happened the day I took him off life support and kissed him goodbye for the last time.

I went home in shock, didnu2019t know what to do with myself.

I hadnu2019t slept more than a couple hours here and there while he was in the hospital, and this day was certainly no different.

I lay in bed that night, forcing myself to close my eyes, doing my best to shut out the racing thoughts in my brain.

Suddenly I felt an arm wrap around my waistu2026 the exact same way my fiance would hold me as we slept.

It felt so real that I jumped out bed, looking around the room for signs that someone was with me; there was no one.

I had dreams about him that night too, where I could see him smiling with his huge dimples and laughing, but I couldnu2019t reach him.

,Another event happened about a week after his funeral.

Still feeling completely lost and alone, I would visit his grave site almost every day.

I cried, I talked to him, I brought flowers, I picked up any dead leaves or sticks that fell onto the fresh dirt.

Visiting u201chimu201d at the cemetery was the only thing that seemed to provide me with a temporary feeling of peace and calm.

On one particularly sunny and warm day, I popped a CD into my car stereo with some of our favorite songs.

My fiance had been a DJ and music producer, so I had some of his music on the CD as well.

The first few songs played as I made the 30 minute drive home, and then u201chisu201d song came on; my favorite song with his voice, that his friend had remixed.

Tears started flowing as I listened to him, but I could never bring myself to skip the song.

As I continued down the road and the song came to an end, it suddenly started over again.

Confused, I checked the stereo to see if u201crepeatu201d had somehow been turned on (though I hadnu2019t touched any buttons, and the first few songs played in order as they normally would).

Repeat was not enabled.

I laughed then, and made a comment like u201cOh, you like when I listen to your music, huh?u201d,These were not the only strange things that happened to me in the month following my fianceu2019s death, but they are the most memorable.

Even if they scared me a bit initially, they always brought me a sense of peace for a little while, like my fiance was giving me signs that he was OK, and that I would be OK too.